How are you doing about the impending (or already present) infections in your community? When we can’t do much to control our own destinies, it’s human nature to be stressed. Here are ways I or members of my community have been taking control of small actions recently.

I’ve verbalized to my children how relatively good a position we’re in. I’ve tried to convey to them that our concern at this point isn’t so much for ourselves (as we are all relatively young and healthy for viral infection purposes), it’s to take care of everyone around us. Pointing this out to others, and hearing myself say it, while it hasn’t changed anything external, makes both my children and myself feel better.

I’ve been helping my family to obtain supplies, by making reasonable lists of groceries that will provide a variety of protein and calories. I’ve also included vitamins and fiber supplements, in case those areas become less well supplied by restricted future shopping.

I’ve previously managed control by making sure our family is on firm financial footing, and we’ve had at least some supply of many things on-hand. I’m not good at giving myself pats on the back for these things, fortunately my husband is good at thinking of them and bringing them up for me to reflect on what’s already been accomplished.

I’ve been kind to people in stores. I’ve kept my head up, I’ve smiled at people, I’ve managed my cart location so that when one or more carts ahead of me are mostly blocking the aisles, I make sure I don’t add to that and hopefully allow cart traffic to continue to flow. I’ve apologized to the one store clerk who was forced to set aside some of my items when I accidentally brought more items to checkout (a late-add limit and badly placed signs meant I didn’t realize I was trying to buy more chicken soup than I was allowed, and one of my children loves it); unfortunately I don’t know that he believed me, but it was accidental and I tried to apologize, so my conscience should be clear (since he didn’t seem to believe me, admittedly I do still feel bad). There were a few times I was grabbing things from top shelves. Knowing that people are purchasing faster than shelves can be restocked, and that I’m taller than average for a female as well as comfortable climbing, I was reaching for way-back items on that top shelf, to leave the front items more available to others. I’ve bagged my own groceries, both so one less person will have touched my items, but also because the store staff is overwhelmed and whoever would be bagging my stuff is therefore freed up to help in some other way. And I’ve looked each store clerk in the eye at the end of my going through their line, and wished them well.

I’ve recognized that I am as subject to the psychology of stockpiling as everyone else. We now have a reasonable supply for a virus-induced “winter” (not just a snow storm), and I can further control the stockpiling impulse by staying out of stores; which will be easier for me with each passing day as I know more and more infected people are out there, contagious.

I’ve emailed with coworkers who were in an increasingly empty building with me. I’ve thanked them for their efforts. I’ve tried to be cheerful with them. I’ve designed remote processes for things that have previously been done in person, and I’ve shared those with everyone who can use them. We are herd creatures, and for many it’s hard to lead when nobody else in the group is willing to move first. So when nobody else is bringing up moving group in-person meetings to another format, I’ve brought it up, I’ve made sure the meeting is either cancelled or moved to virtual or I’ve made it clear I won’t be attending due to the group contact risk and tried to educate on the need for social distancing.

And, hardest for me, I’ve proactively advocated to coworkers and supervisor, school leadership, family members, and friends. I’ve done my best to educate about the necessity and methods of early preparation, early and long lasting social distancing, the value of flattening the curve, and the need to prepare for a long duration (months, not days). I’ve given data with which to fight the misleading, political, statements being made from “leaders” at all levels. Less stressful (because I love to teach, but teaching is different from pushing to people who I know respect me but haven’t asked for my opinion), I’ve shared the benefits of my years of experience in biostatistics and my perspective with people who have been unsure and willing to ask, and to you my blog readers. In all of those cases, I’ve been able to tailor my advice and my messaging directly to the audience, to make it as effective at conveying the information as possible.

How are you taking control? If you need more control in your life, feel free to steal ideas I’ve presented. Or if you have others, we would all benefit from an array of choices, please share!